On behalf of Vagibond, we wish to address the deeply unfortunate events that occurred during our inaugural Vagibond Developers Conference in Wuhan, China in December 2019.

We extend our condolences to global humanity for any inconvenience caused by certain attendees who, seeking alcoholic beverages after the hotel bar closed, allegedly gained unauthorized access to a nearby research facility. While we cannot confirm the precise sequence of events, we categorically deny any corporate responsibility for the subsequent global health situation that some media outlets have sensationally linked to our conference.

We take some comfort in knowing that the individuals responsible for this breach of facility security were among the first casualties of the resulting outbreak. We trust they learned the consequences of their disruptive actions, and we hope their families can find peace knowing their loved ones' final acts were in pursuit of an open bar.

The Vagibond legal team wishes to note that correlation does not imply causation, and that our conference merely happened to coincide with what epidemiologists have described as "patient zero proximity."

We have learned our lesson about hosting conferences near biosecurity facilities and will not repeat the same mistake in the future.